Joyful Mayhem

I reall y don't want to play victim. I also seem to have shit happen to me all the time. I can't figure out how to reconcile the two. I have been feeling particularly invisible lately. It's sort of a recurring theme. I don't know if it's because my tolerance is down & irritability is up, or if it's happening more or what, but I'm sort of at the breaking point. I backed WAY off facebook...just to see if anyone would notice. (I held off singing the "Everybody hates me, Nobody likes me, I think I'll go eat some worms" song for now.) It took 3 weeks before anyone noticed, or at least said anything to me. I had a couple people leave me messages, but only one person was even someone I'd consider a friend vs. a "facebook friend". It's just sort of telling I guess. The one friend that commented said that she fbooked for herself. I agree somewhat. I mean, I think we all do. But isn't that the point of face

hahaha.. that makes me laugh. Seriously, I know I can have quite the potty mouth. If I'm being honest, I can have quite the sailor mouth, but I tame it down to potty mouth. I recently read the following on a tweet from a person I follow. She was a Big Fat Loser contestant and then a trainer I know sent the reply: Tweet 1: " Ever wish, u could just tell some1 2 smile - shit ain't that bad." Tweet 2: : "I wish that all the time. If they'd smile they'd feel so much better evn for a minute" Yes, folks...these are the same people, I'm SURE, that would tell a someone who suffers from depression to "buck up" or "snap out of it" etc. It infuriates me. I don't think they would tell a diabetic to not take their insulin, but instead, "wish real hard to get your numbers up" or "just eat sugar and make your body adjust". I wanted to reply to them both "F&*# o&&!" bu

Procrastination...distraction. I have it down. Today I had the whole day to get a few things done. Well, one thing really. And it wouldn't have even taken all of my time. Now I don't particularly think it's a bad thing to have some down time per se...but when it's instead of the important task at hand. Um yah... So I've successfully taken care of lots of little unimportant things, and have run the clock out to 15 minutes left. Certainly that's not enough time to work on the budget. Ugh. When I stopped and realized I was picking the little pieces of paper left behind in the spiral of the spiral notebook, I recognized and admitted my problem. Of course, THAT was the time to again open the computer and blog for the first time in 6 months. sweet...5 more minutes gone and now that i found that cool picture...3 more